The World is not Black and White...
Colors abound like the wind...

Life is not black and white...
Life  flying on the winds of change...

About me are the bursting blushing colors of Fall...
When the Earth, as the Godess bids, readies herself for the birth of Spring
Fall..Winter...Spring..Summer...

All mean so much to me...
She rests her head upon her hand...
It matters not that this hand is numb..
It is still hers...

She reaches for her cup...
It matters not that she must do this by sight...
Since Hands are numb...yet teeming with Life...
She washes the dishes...

It matters not that her nerve endings are on fire...
These Hands Nurture...

She struggles through thee laundry...
It matters not that her body is deemed "beyond Salvage" by most Doctors...
This body does the tasks that say I Care...

She wakes up screaming silently from the pain...
It matters not that her legs will bruise where the muscles rip and turn black and blue...

These legs are the ones which enable her to walk...against all odds...
She cries in the middle of the night...
It matters not that her soul and heart and spirit are torn asunder...

Her heart, spirit and soul soar on the currents of Life...
She laughs daily...
It matters not to her that they have almost conquered her soul..
like a vanquished warrior..

Her laugh is like the windchimes dancing in the wind...
She endures...
It matters not that the pangs of anxiety and inadequacy engulf her...

She strives to throw off these shackles...A prison no more...
She lives...
It matters not that the path is etched with the agonies and angst of the damned...

She continues...for all time...
She wakes...
It matters not that she cannot walk a step at this time...
Muscles creak with stretching...

She will cry and move....pay the price...
She packs lunches...
It matters not....Children must eat ...
She slowly completes her task...

She cries......after the children get on the bus.....silently...only in a
hidden corner of her heart...
It Matters not...They are her life...
She aches...She bleeds pain...Yet...she continues against all odds...

She thinks of the why's...and knows there is no answer...
It matters not...The Goddess shall guard her thoughts...
She let's go of the why's...why bother....It will not change the
Pain..and Life must be lived...

She wonders...reading medical records...of the ironies of it all...
It matters not ..She knows the truth...
She writes and notes ...what is real and what is fiction...

She desires...Life at it's most wondrous...
It matters not as she is grabbing and wringing out every moment of Joy and Love in Life...
She wishes to sit one day.not regretting what she has not done...but the Awe
of her accomplishments...

She sits with her chin on her hand...gazing out at the sun...the rays
showing the energy of Life..
It matters not...that today she cannot move without great pain...
She demands only the all of what her capacities and potentials are...

She speaks of the pain with friends...those who know the reality of it...
It matters not the masses who slander us...
She knows the truth in her heart of hearts...It beats like a drum...It is her pulse...

She tries to help...
It matters not to her to ignorance of others...
She is educating those whom she can reach...

She smiles..a gentle smile...one of contentment...
When she sees the fruition of her work...
A Peaceful Radiant Smile Full of Love and Light...
Squeezing her secret to her...

That it is not about how one lives their lives..though that is important...
The truly important thing is to Live your Life by staying in the game...
 

Erin Samantha Bishop
copyright
11/20/98